We speak to family lawyer, Michael Lowry of Stephens Scown LLP, who gives us his best advice for surviving divorce.
Nobody goes into a marriage believing it will end in divorce, yet it’s an uncomfortable reality that’s faced by almost half of all marriages in the UK. If you find yourself in this difficult situation, it can be easy to feel isolated and overwhelmed.
Leading divorce lawyer, Michael Lowry from Stephens Scown LLP says: “ Divorce is an emotional, draining and difficult process, but you still need a clear head as you make decisions that will affect the rest of your life.”
Stephens Scown has produced a guide for those going through divorce, drawing on advice from clients. Some of their tips include telling your friends and family so that they can support you, and remembering to take care of yourself by eating well, getting enough sleep and getting exercise. They also recommend counselling, which can help you understand what’s happening and find ways to cope and move forward.
It’s important that you try not to get angry; find someone who can help you gain perspective and be a levelling influence on you. Let go all the bad things and avoid blaming yourself or your partner for things that are in the past. In this vein, taking legal advice early is crucial, as it will save you both time, and money in the long run.
Finding balance in your life is also important, and Michael tells us: “It is okay to enjoy doing other things and take your mind off what you’re going through.”
If you have children, be honest with them about what’s happening and explain that it’s not their fault. You may be tempted to hide things from them, but that can often mean that they’ll imagine the worst.
Finally, Michael says: “Remember that nothing lasts forever. Things will get better, you just need to hang in there until they do.”
“No matter what your circumstances are, if you find yourself starting 2018 with a divorce, please have faith that even if life seems bleak now, it will get better. You are not alone, and there is help and support available for you. Sometimes, the hardest parts of life can turn out to be the start of positive new beginnings.”
STEPHENS SCOWN CORNWALL